MY STALIN ARTICLE [AN ATTEMPT TO ADD EDGINESS TO MY PUNK PERSONA]

TAKEN FROM SECOND ISSUE:

So during our last ‘zine meeting’ i was told to make an article on Stalin in order to make this zine to look a little bit intellectual– yup, I know. We are just a bunch of dumbass who want to become ‘budak rare’. Edgy fukkwitt with a bag of ‘street knowledge’ that gonna trimm the pubic hair of others edgecunt. Talking about the things that will make us look cool in the eyes of you punk wannabes and politics and communism seems to be a hot things these days. Truth be told, I’ve little to none ‘knowledge’ that i now about this Stalin dude. Marxism and communism is not a particular topic that I’d an interest in. Oh well,  just enjoy this ‘not so educational’ writing on Stalin..

APPEARANCE

First and foremost, before going deeper into it let us judge ‘the book by its cover’. the first rule of being a famous cult figures is that you need to have a trademark. That particular characteristic and feature that people could easily recognized. Something that could give a long lasting impression. A trademark that numerous peoples could parody in the future (like the great Chaplin and Hitler). If you want to be an idol or cult legend the first thing that you need to be is not to look like a fukkin This Man. Stand Out!

Specific. If you want to be a great charismatic alpha figure then having a distinctive facial hair is what you need to have. Whether it is beard or mustache. Dali, Nietzsche, Hitler, Peter Kropotkin and Stalin. You can recognize these classic legends through their insane facial hair (and that is why Mao is the lamest political figure of all time. No facial hair. Fuck you Mao!).

ANA-FUKKIN-LYSIS

joseph-stalin-AB

let’s fukkin start-o

Look onto Stalin mustachio. Sturdily big which must also meant that Caucasian Stalin must had a 10 inch penis for sure. No doubt about that dude -everyone know that a big mustachio equals big dick (basic science). This big mustachio might also a symbolized of dominance and territorial -the bigger your dick (mustachio also applicable) the bigger it is your dominance among the alpha male pact (basic social science). Now, look at how symmetry that shit is, Balance-ly divided into two portion. For something as thicc as that dude probably  spent a lot of time cleanly taking care of it which meant that he was a ‘control freak’- a man of perfection. Overall his mustachio is filled with the sense of masculinity and strong attitude which mean that he might be a pushy kind of guy (no wonder dude end-up being a totalitarian, look at his mustachio ffs).

BTW,kudos to this dude. The amount of effort that Stalin spent on pampering that mustachio of him despite being a busy totalitarian leader is worth for some recognition. now look a Kropotkin ugly facial hair.  For someone that was born out of aristocrat privileged family Kropotkin should be ashamed of himself. Seriously Kropotkin, your facial hair more like a pubic hair. Especially with that bald head of yours. Dude head look like a fukkin penis with pubic hair. What are you, (A) hippy? Shame on you. This goes to show that money can’t buy class. Enter Puan VIDA..

SHITTY RUNDOWN..

What about the man himself. Well, Stalin was indeed a totalitarian leader. A freakin facist to be exactly accurate. He used fear and terror to control the society. His totalitarian ideology would later be described as Stalinism. Keep in mind that Stalinism, communism, Marxism, Maoism are are very different things bro. what make it different ? Well I can’t really tell much about it as my research in this kind of field is not really depth.  What I love about this dude for me is the his 5 years plan on Soviet Union. I love a man that has an ambition and put a timeline on it.

So the conclusion that can be derived here is whenever you want to make a plan make sure you have a timeline (dateline) for it.it help you to focus and be more proactive towards your goals. Heck, us in Trypophobia Zine also have a dateline (the dateline would be the KLZineFest) for us to released our zine.  Kau tak siap? – lantak la – dateline weih – published je. perfection? meh. We’re just a shitty wannabe zinester, we’ll try to be as best as we could with our zine but fukkit with perfection (we’re just a shitty wannabe zinester). This also explained why this article (and every article in Trypophobia really) is aesthetically shitty. Last minute work and I am just too lazy for some boring Wikipedia reading.. but hey, for me to be able to write this shit without doing some wiki reading is a prove that i am fukkin edgy already.. edgy pretentious punkwannabe.. fuck yeah brader!

So what else..hurmmm. I don’t know la dude. Politics are not my kind of thing these days so go freakkin do your own research. You can get a hell lot more information from the internet than an unreliable wannabe like me. click this O and enter the amazing world of wikipedia.

Ciaooo…

 

 

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